Prayer

If God had a refrigerator, your picture would be on it. If He had a wallet, your photo would be in it. He sends you flowers every spring and a sunrise every morning. Whenever you want to talk, He'll listen. He can live anywhere in the universe, and He chose your heart. 
—Max Lucado

I was sitting in bed the other afternoon, tossing and turning, still had a couple hours before needing to go to work. And all I could think about was this tugging in my mind and heart that I had been ignoring for a couple days (let's be honest, it's been a couple months). I just didn't know how to approach or resolve this issue that I was becoming aware of, so I kept pushing it off. I had a longing, a need deep within that wasn't being met. And I realized, all this time, that I was seeking to fill that void in places and people that couldn't fill it. I have been expecting so much from myself, my life, and the people around me, that when my expectations weren't met, I let disappointment stir up aggravation and despair in my life.

I'd realized the last time I had read my Bible was on Easter Sunday. 20 days. 20 days I went without even opening my Bible. Over the last couple months, I have become more aware of the distance I have allowed to come between myself and God. You have probably heard the saying, 'if you feel far away from God, guess who moved?' Well, guess what, it was me. It is always me, not Him.

I got up out of bed, went and grabbed my Bible, then kneeled down beside my bed. I was reevaluating how I pray to God, and what prayer means to me. I had some hesitation, because I knew my heart wasn't right with God at this point. I had to get some things off of my chest, and I needed some help. He was the only One with enough power to help me through it. I didn't know where to begin. How do I fix this relationship. Do I pray, do I read His Word, do I worship, what is best? The answer I was given, was pray. So that is what I did. I had such an informal conversation with God, tears were shed, emotions leaking out of me like a sopping wet towel being wrung. I poured out my desires, my needs, my sorrows, my sins, the burdens that I had on my heart for myself, for others.

I was raised in a Christian home. We didn't read the Bible a lot as a family, but we attended church every Sunday and Wednesday. We didn't routinely pray before meals, we did on holidays or at special events, or if everyone happened to be together, we would. But praying before meals wasn't a norm. We would recite Bible verses as young children, sing songs, and sometimes pray before bedtime. It wasn't that prayer wasn't important, it just wasn't a main focus that I remember being emphasized in my younger years. It wasn't like I was never taught how to pray, or that we never did it, just not all the time, it wasn't a constant, nor did I feel like it was missing when we didn't do it. But now, I have this hunger, this longing for prayer, this need to talk to God, and it has been persistent, a constant feeling of incompleteness.
I throw out a 'thank you Jesus!' here and there when something I have been hoping for works out, and definitely turn to Him when I am having a rough day, week, month, year, etc. But I definitely do not pray as often as I could. And in not spending that time with God, and humbling myself before Him, acknowledging the transparency that already exists (He sees and knows all things, whether I tell Him about them or not), has caused me to step farther and farther away from God's side.

I don't have a lot of friends, and certainly not a lot of friends that I trust well enough to delve into my insecurities and insufficiencies in life with. But I would say I 'know' a lot of people, and most of these people believe me to be a kind, nice, Christian girl. But boy do I sure catch myself falling short of that oh so often. I catch myself judging others. I catch myself holding grudges. I catch myself being hostile. I catch myself withholding kindness and good deeds, not going the extra mile for others like I used to, simply because I give and do and give and do things for others, and quite often get nothing in return. And I never even used to care. I never expected anything back, not even a thank you, often I did things in secret, simply to avoid receiving any undue praise (because to God be the glory, not I). I did and did and did and went on with life. I was servant, and I loved my ability to be that.

Then slowly, I wandered away from that. My heart was hardened towards people, my eyes closed to their needs. Things would happen that I should feel some emotion about, whether sorrow or joy or whatever, and I would remain emotionless. I would note that I was not responding appropriately, and would wonder for a second, what was wrong with me, and then move on.

I am craving deep meaningful relationships. I'm lacking in meeting my emotional needs amongst my peers because of my choice of relationships I've been making priority in my life. And in doing so, my heart and mind have been hardened to the burdens and issues in others' lives. This change has become more and more evident in my life, and God has made it clear that I need to do something about it.

So prayer. That is where I am beginning. My relationship with God. That is where I am beginning. To better myself, so I can better serve God and others.


'You keep track of all my sorrows. You have collected all my tears in a bottle. You have recorded each one in a book.' Psalm 56:8 (NLT)
'For though the righteous fall seven times, they rise again, but the wicked stumble when calamity strikes.' Proverbs 24:16 (NIV)
'Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus.' 1 Thes 5:16-18 (NIV)


It doesn't matter what your background was. It doesn't matter what you were or weren't taught. What matters is what you do with what you know and who you are today. Take time to try and be a better person, learn new things. You don't have to take huge steps, because the longer the stride the more likely you are to fall. Take it one little step at a time, and soon enough they will add up to you having moved so much farther than you ever thought possible.

Pray fervently. Live passionately. Love everybody.

Father's Day

Heavenly Father

True fatherhood is grounded in the basis of God's being---in the basis of God the Father relating to the Son and the Spirit. Human fatherhood is but an imperfect symbol of this transcendent reality. The Fatherhood of God is not inconsequential of alterable, for it is the primary basis by which God has determined that believers will relate to Him: 'I will receive you, and will be a Father unto you, and ye shall be my sons and daughters, saith the Lord God Almighty.' 2 Corinthians 6:17-18
 
God reveals Himself as 'Father' throughout the Old Testament of the Bible. (Jeremiah 3:19). This was also a term Jesus used when addressing Him (John 17)
 


Earthly fathers
Fathers in the Bible were supreme authoritative figures in their families. With just a word, they could determine the fate of their offspring. But they were also encouraged to be patient (Ephesians 6:4), to love unconditionally, to forgive without strings attached, and to give abundantly. (Luke 15:11-32)
 
Fathers have unique access to their children's hearts. Their tender love and intentional leadership can build confidence and instill character like nothing else. On the other hand, harsh words and emotional distance can devastate even the most resilient kiddos.
 
Scriptures present a tender side of fatherhood: 
In Matthew, a temple official came to Jesus frantic for his daughter's healing. (Matthew 9:18-26)
 
In Genesis and 2 Samuel, Jacob and David display deep sorrow at the loss of their sons. (Genesis 37:33-35 2 Samuel 13:35-39)
 
In Genesis and Matthew, Noah and Joseph (Jesus' earthly father) followed God's direction and provided escapes from danger for their children. (Genesis 7:5, Matthew 2:13-23) 
 
But fathers in the Bible weren't perfect; they made their mistakes:  
In 1 Samuel we see where Eli did not set limits for his sons. (1 Samuel 2:12 & 3:13)
 
In 2 Samuel we see that David doesn't make time to spend much with his children, and how he certainly did not live an exemplary life before them. (2 Samuel 12:13,14 & 24:10)

 

Mother's impact on fathers
A mother helps to fashion a good father. She makes him feel loved and accepted, treating him with respect. she shows respect for his position of leadership. She does not undermine his authority, she offers encouragement, reflective interaction, and supportive interest.
 
Reminders for fathers, found in the Bible
1) It is important to make your child(ren) feel wanted (Psalm 127:3-5)
 
2) You are to instruct your child(ren) (Deuteronomy 6:1-9, Proverbs 4:1 & 6:20)
 
3) Train your child(ren) (Psalm 78:5-7, Proverbs 22:6)
 
4) Correct your child(ren) (Proverbs 13:24)
 
The shelter and security provided by a godly father should give their children freedom for growth without overprotection from challenges or tasks that teach responsibility. (1 Samuel 3:1-10)
  
I do believe that the most immediate and potentially impactful way a father can love his child(ren) is by loving their mother well. Children are always watching, listening, and feeling the way their mothers are loved by their fathers. They hear how their father speaks about their mother when she isn't around. They learn how their father respects their mother by observing it directly---even when they don't think their children are watching. They see how their father loves their mother when she is hurting, after they've had an argument, and when they laugh together. They see their father give himself up for their mother, sacrificing their agendas to better serve her more selflessly. (Ephesians 5:25-27)



My father 
If you know me on a personal level, and have for at least a moderate amount of time, then you have probably come into contact with my father at some point in our relationship. He is a humble guy. A guy who sometimes will let you know exactly what he thinks about your wardrobe choices for the day. (Unless it's  me, then it is ALWAYS, he always lets me know how he feels about my wardrobe choices, even if it is to a woman at church who happens to be a good friend of mine with a huge heart, and is also married to a doctor that I work alongside with quite often at work.) In family pictures, you are guaranteed that someone will receive bunny ears from Pops, and if no one will allot him the pleasure, then he will just throw 'em up behind his own head, it's 'tradition,' just ask him!



Sometimes he calls me 20 times in 1 day. Sometimes he wishes I would just 'go back to Ulysses' when he decides he has had enough of my company. He sometimes gets mad, and usually is a total control freak. He wants the pickup moved, just so, and probably secretly wishes that the cows would walk in a certain order while we are moving them from pasture to pasture. But let me tell ya, he loves; he loves unconditionally. After all the heck that I have given him growing up, (and even more so now that I am out of the house), I am glad that we don't even have to say out loud that I am his favorite daughter. (Parents you shouldn't have favorites, so all kidding aside, I do not condone favoritism amongst your offspring.)

Don't worry, I was spanked as much, (if not more than) the rest of my siblings. Well, with disregard to the last two, because I am pretty sure they have only been beat like twice in all of their lives. Younger siblings these days, am I right?
 
Back in December, if you have followed my blog at that time, you read about the moment where for just a second, I thought my earthly father may possibly not be with us any longer. If you didn't, you can read about it in my blog Nothing is Beyond the Reach of God's Hands and read about his hospital stay/updates/progress in reverse chronological order Pop's Hospital Adventures.
 
I am glad to announce he is doing much better. He has taken some necessary to be removed weight off, and is usually following his medication and diet regimen that was ordered by his doctor, but sometimes he does get a bit slacky in that department.
 
I was reading in Ephesians the other day, and it was extremely fitting for fathers:
"See then that ye walk circumspectly, not as fools, but as wise, redeeming the time, because the days are evil. Wherefore be ye not unwise, but understanding what the will of the Lord is. And be not drunk with wine, wherein is excess, but be filled with the Spirit; speaking to yourselves in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing and making melody in your heart to the Lord; giving thanks always for all things unto God and the Father in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ; submitting yourselves one to another in the fear of God." Ephesians 5:16-21

The best earthly father is one who has a vibrant fellowship and always strengthening relationship with the heavenly Father and therefor has access to the Lord's unlimited wisdom and vast resources. I love to see how my Pops shows God's love to strangers and family alike. He is such an inspiration and I am beyond blessed to claim him as my father.

To Dads worldwide

No one has the perfect father, therefor no one is the perfect father. You may think you have/had the worst father in the entire planet, but I promise you didn't. And even if he was as awful as you make him sound like, who cares. He is who he is and you cannot change that. But what you can do, is strive daily to be a better husband, better father, and better son of God. You can do you better when Jesus is in your heart. Encourage your children, build them up, teach them about the love of Jesus. Put it in action as you instruct them about it. Discipline your children in love. In case you missed it, mostly your children need love. Love them with all your heart as often as you get the opportunity to do so.

Good Good Father ~ Chris Tomlin             Just the Way I Am ~ Big Daddy Weave

Through My Father's Eyes ~ Holly Starr

'Mom, I'm hungry.'

'Mom, I'm hungry.'  Blurts out my 5-year-old nephew in the back seat of the van.

...fast forward 67 seconds...   

 '...still hungry Mom!'

Like hello Mom, did you forget? My stomach is still hollering at me! It doesn't matter how patient or impatient I am, I cannot control how patient my stomach is!

I think that we are this way with God. We pray, fervently perhaps, for things we think we need or know we want. We pray over and over again, maybe we pray for the same thing twice in the same prayer, just in case God may have forgotten, like his Mom must have forgotten about his hunger pains. We pray that God will heal all ills and comfort those who are hurting. Not tomorrow though, we cannot wait on tomorrow, but why not right now? God fix us now, comfort them now, You can, so why don't You? Why do You feel the need to 'try our patience' for so long?

We find it unfair at times, life in general, but especially the moments where God is saying, 'Trust me, I know what I am doing. I see the pain in your heart, I know the ending, give Me time, and let Me do what I do, one day you too will understand dear child.' God is perfectly just, even when circumstances seem terribly unfair. He has a plan, His timing can be trusted.

He tells us in the book of Proverbs, chapter 3 verse 5 to 'Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding.'   '...with ALL thine heart.' What does this mean to you? To me, it means no matter what my brain thinks is possible or impossible, no matter what my emotions believe is fair or unfair, no matter what the world tells me is just or unjust, the Lord is in control, especially when I don't understand it. God makes many promises in His Word, but not that life will be fair. Not that life will be easy. Not that life will work according to our plans and purposes, but His plans. In Romans 8:28 Paul writes that, 'we know that for those who love God, all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose.' Emphasizing, that it is not what we want when we want it, but what we need when He determines we need it, for His glory.

There are a lot of things about God that I don't know and cannot explain, but one thing I know is true; God loves at all times.

I know that He will never leave us.

I know that this battle isn't ours. The battle belongs to the Lord, let Him fight for you. Save your emotional energy and use it to dig into His Word like never before. Our job is to be obedient to God, His job is winning the battle. We can't do it alone anyway, just let Him do Him.

I know that the battle may not be easy or short-lived, but victory will be there for those who trust in God.

I know that God is good, even when circumstances are darker than you ever imagined. God is good even when people aren't. God is good even when things seem stinking hopeless. God is good even we aren't. God is good and can be trusted.

And, I know that God is good at being God. Don't try to fix what He hasn't assigned you to fix. Be patient and know the He is working on it. 

 
Be still. And know, He is God. Be patient, He has it under control.

God doesn't simply pour a big dose of patience into our lives overnight. He builds it in us, through experiences--sometimes very hard ones, and sometimes very small and seemingly silly ones... The small experiences increase our capacity to tackle bigger ones with greater strength. Each experience, big or small, is training us to endure, creating a solid foundation in our lives to prepare us for what may come.

 Trust in You- ~ Lauren Daigle                                       Breathe ~ Jonny Diaz      

 While I'm Waiting ~ John Waller

Questions I Have

 

'He will send you a soul mate you won't have to chase after.' -Adam Cappa

So, where do I draw the line, and how fine should it be? Where am I pushing too much or expecting too much (from Him and/or the potential Mr. Forever)? Can I fall in love with someone who is not a Christian? Can I control who I fall in love with? If I fall in love with someone who does not love my God as I do, is that a sin? Is my desire to share my faith with him, in hopes of planting a seed for the Spirit to tend to and hopefully bloom in his heart, so that we can live happily ever after such a bad thing? How will I know?

What if God has shown me the 'one' He has for me at this point in my life and I didn't give that person the time of day? What now? Is there another? Am I to believe there is just one 'soul mate' for everyone? 7.3 billion people on Earth and God has set only one aside for me? 159 million men in America, and I am to believe God has set aside just one for me? I only need one, but who's to say that only one exists? Only one person on earth is meant to catch my eye, steal my heart, and worship my God with me?

Is there something wrong with me? Is there a reason Mr. Forever may not be in my life yet? Is there a reason my ring finger and the other side of the bed are still vacant? What is God's plan with me? Am I where I am supposed to be? If God is all I need, then why do I yearn for a man in my life? Does that mean I am making God smaller, less important? How much work should I be putting into this search for my Mr. Forever? God calls some people to be single, is that my calling? If yes, then why does not a day go by that I don't wish Mr. Forever was here?

How content am I supposed to be, where is the line? Am I where I am today because of past mistakes? Did I mess up something that was meant to blossom into something beautiful years ago? What do I do with these unexpected single years? Why has life not panned out like I mapped out in my mind in 7th grade?

God has given me these single years for a reason, there is a purpose, but how will I know that this purpose has been fulfilled? How do I keep myself from squandering them away while I wait for Mr. Forever?

 I wish God would text me a picture, and be like,

'Rach, this guy right here. His heart is solid, his intentions well, and he is the man I intend for you to spend the rest of your life on earth with. {Insert time and date of first interaction with said man}  #worshippartner #areyouready #youarewelcome #lookathim #ainthenice  #prayerpartner #keepmefirst #praytogethersticktogether #marriagevowsareforevervows'

***Because of course, if God texted He would totally hashtag! #likeaboss #TheBoss

Needless to say, this girl needs some soul-feeding time with her King while she waits for her prince. He is the only one with the ability to answer my questions.

Mmm. Jamie Grace nails it on the head in her song 'The Waiting' check it out here!

 

Don't Just Hand a Band-Aid to the Wounded Soul

 

I went to the doctor a week or so ago, because my foot had been hurting for quite some time, (the feet in the picture are not mine, but simply for illustration) and the pain had become straight up unbearable. Before leaving I was told, 'I don't think anything is broken' (I concur) and to take some ibuprofen, apply ice and heat, and call back in 7-10 days if it isn't better.

I do believe I received the right treatment that day, but what if my 3-minute visit was for something more serious that may have went unnoticed because of lack of time spent with me, or concern given? What if she hadn't asked the right questions and I hadn't given the honest answers. I work with said doctor as a nurse on the acute care floor here in the hospital where I am employed, so she is somewhat familiar with me, but that was the first time she had ever seen me on that side of the spectrum, patient to doctor, not the usual nurse to doctor, caring for the same patient. Having that background professionally made me more certain that I would receive the care necessary for my dilemma, because I know what kind of doctor she is and how knowledgeable, but sometimes that is not always the case.

We don't go to the doctor with any intentions of lying, but sometimes information may get skewed. The patient may have already Google-diagnosed and only gives the answers that will result in the way they want their appointment to end and their home instructions to play out. Sometimes we come running to the clinic to be seen for something that we see as major, that may have been going on for a long time, and sometimes we get 2 minutes, a Band-Aid, an antibiotic, and a 'see you later, get well.' --- That upsets us, that upsets our mothers, and it upsets our insurance companies (and our bank accounts) when we have go come running back, this time to the ER because the clinic is closed on weekends, and the 'running back' only happens on weekends, or after midnight you know!) because the first issue wasn't properly addressed and is now more complex, requiring more treatment, and quite possibly hospitalization.

If we don't want to get Band-Aided for our physical health, why should we Band-Aid those around us who are suffering in their spiritual health.

What if that lost soul or broken heart came to church seeking love or friendship, God and answers, but we didn't take a real moment to get to know them? What if they came for months, and you still didn't have the slightest clue to what their story entailed? What if even though you never asked the right questions, slowly they gave you hints and tidbits on what was really going on, and you never picked up on them and never tried to put that puzzle together? What if they already know what's wrong with them, maybe abortion, a miscarriage, maybe a hurting relationship, maybe abuse, a death in the family, maybe total and complete despair, maybe financial issues, maybe health that hasn't been restored even while trusting and giving it completely to Him. We may say hello, we may temporarily bandage them with some artificial and possibly forced love and hugs as they walk in or walk out, but let us not be a Band-Aid society, let us really delve in and get to know the people in our churches on Sundays, Wednesdays, and any other day of the week. Take them to lunch, give them a few extra minutes after the service before you run off with your other 'more important' priorities each week. Embrace their need for the Savior.

Maybe God has allowed this person to hit rock bottom and come into contact with you because He has a plan and He knows you too have a story. No matter what that story of your own entails, if He is a part of it, you can always be there for that person in need, love on them, and pray for their needs whether they be physically, spiritually, &/or emotionally. So what if your past is in ruins and full of mistakes, join the club. So what if you aren't 'perfect', weird, you must be human. God chose you and wants to use you, so let Him!

It Really is the Thought that Counts

The Thought that Counts

It's not the words coming out of your mouth, it's not your Facebook status updates. It's what's in your brain and on your heart. God and you. The only ones for the rest of time who will know the whole truth and nothing but when it comes to where you are in your walk with Him, and how you really feel about your neighbor, or teaching that Sunday school class, for example.

I have struggled with this a lot lately. I am the master of the façade. I can smile all day any day, like my life is just blissful and perfect and not a thing goes wrong, ever. But, I have learned, that is not what gets me through the day. And that it's not always as convincing as I think it is. Whenever anyone asks me how I am, how my day was, how my week was, my response? Fantastic! Awesome! Great! Because those words are easy to roll off the tongue, and almost guarantee that that person won't pry deeper. If they did, I would probably just lie again, and say all is well and fine and perfect. But, truth be told, I am hurting. I am sleep deprived, I am weak, I need God. And I need prayer, way more than I think I do, and much more than I am willing to ask for.

My pastor just this last Sunday asked everyone to remain standing, then proceeded to say, those of you who don't have a need in your life that you need prayer for, sit down. And that is when my heart broke. My heart broke for the people in my church, those that I am surrounded with each week, who I have not made a point of getting to know, those people are hurting and they need my prayer. Now as I sit here, and try and remember every face I saw Sunday, retrieving mental images pew by pew, or chair by chair, I know I have forgotten many, but I know that God knows they are all on my heart, and I know He hears my asking Him to help them with their needs, whether "big" or "small," He hears them all.

When you give to the church, to others, to the homeless man on the corner, that gift means nothing to God if your heart and thoughts weren't in the right spot. We should not be giving for the tax break, or for the recognition and the "thank you". We don't give in church because God needs it, everything we have is already His, and we only have it because He gave it to us. We should be giving because we want to, because it brings us joy, because we as Christians should have an inward desire to give.

And this doesn't only relate to gifts of money, but with assistance, service, favors, etc. Don't open that door for that elderly woman because you have to, but because you want to! Don't offer to serve that meal because someone encouraged you to sign up, and you felt like you had to, serve that meal with a smile and a servant's heart.

Here about a year ago now, I picked up a woman walking down the side of the highway between the town I lived in and the town I commuted to for work. It was just about freezing outside, and she hardly had what I would call a coat on. Of course I felt bad for her, and initially thought the trip was just going to be to the town I worked in, and had dinner plans made for in. But the trip extended to another town half hour away, out of the way, but I told her I had time, and was willing. Yes it was snowing, and yes the town that I took her to had received the most snow out of all of the surrounding towns, and yes I wondered at one point if I was going to make it back. And yes, I started to regret my decision before we even reached our destination. Yes I spent most of that trip telling her it was fine, everything was okay, and then inwardly punching myself for being so stupid and too nice and getting myself into such a bind. I ended up bringing said lady back to the town I work in, thus wasting all of that time and worry for literally nothing, right? No. I know that God put me in that woman's life for a reason. She cried over and over again on the way back, because of my playlist, the songs touched her so much, and while she was telling me her story. God let me touch that woman's heart, even though my heart was not where it needed to be. That day could have been completely different, and my smile more honest, if I would have given that woman a ride for Jesus! If I would have opened my door to her with a more willing heart and more thankful mind.

So turn your eyes upon Jesus today! Open your heart and mind to Him, and stay focused on His Word. What you say and how you act will be what the world sees, but how you feel and what you think, that is what God sees. And He knows. Live for Him, love for Him, and serve for Him.

In Job, chapter 2 verse 3, the Lord is speaking with Satan, and He says, "Hast thou considered my servant Job, that there is none like him in the earth, a perfect and upright man, one that feareth God, and escheweth* evil? and still he holdeth fast his integrity, although thou movedst me against him, to destroy him without cause." Oh to be spoken of by God Himself in such a manner. I want to strive to be more like Job, to have God say, "Well done, good and faithful servant." Something that helps encourage me to try my hardest to do so is knowing that God sees me and He knows what is in my heart, but guess who else is always watching, the devil, and I just find joy in knowing that I am ruining his day every time I do something pleasing to God, every little or big battle I win with God against Satan.

Strive to live your life today, serving others, with a servant's heart, open and willing to do whatever God needs you to do for whoever God places in your life to serve.



Psalm 19:14  "Let the words of my mouth, and the meditations of my heart, be acceptable in thy sight, O Lord, my strength, and my redeemer." (KJV)

1 Peter 1:22 "Seeing ye have purified your souls in obeying the truth through the Spirit unto unfeigned love of the brethren, see that ye love one another with a pure heart fervently." (KJV)

"In this life we cannot always do great things. But we can do small things with great love."
             -Mother Theresa

Romans 15:1-2 "1We then that are strong ought to bear the infirmities of the weak, and not to please ourselves. 2 Let every one of us please his neighbor for his good to edification." (KJV)



 *eschew definition-verb: to abstain or keep away from; shun; avoid