Birthday Blessings

Today marks the 25th year of my existence on this earth. 

 

Many things have happened in the past year, some good, some great, some horrible, awful, heart-wrenching, and faith testing. Some things I could control, both good and bad, and some were out of my hands.

 

I watched many people suffer in the hospital, cared for some elderly until they gave their last breath.

I was able to give my time as a member of a Nurse's Honor Guard for a funeral of a dearly loved patient, which was beyond an honor.

<--- (Fun pic to tickle your funny bone!)

I went on a couple dates with a couple men in our area, and then they quit talking to me. It amazes me! Everyone all around me tells me I am just perfect wife material, girlfriend material, yada yada yada. Let's just say, this chica is not convinced!

I held a dead baby in my arms, a beautiful baby that didn't respond to our code blue procedures. A baby that God knew He needed in heaven before we here on earth were ready to let the baby go. After which I was numb. I walked out of the ER, back upstairs, just couldn't talk, couldn't cry, couldn't hardly convince my lungs to keep breathing, (praise God that that is my parasympathetic nervous system's job to control). I finished with report to the next shift, woke my sister, walked outside, and immediately texted my best friend. I drove to Johnson, numb. Somehow was able to give my sister a glimpse of the horror I had just experienced. Not for sympathy, but so she would know why I was acting the way I was. Why talkative, joyful Rachael wasn't saying a word or smiling. 

And it gets worse. I thought that was a bad day, but no. An even worse day happened that month, I broke a friend's heart. I seriously hurt someone that I love. Nothing feels worse than that. Even holding a lifeless baby in my arms doesn't come close to the pain I have felt since that day, just knowing the pain I caused her. 

Then we had a big scare with my Dad...it scared me, but again, for some reason when it comes to my own family members and loved ones being sick or hurt, it tends to not worry me as much. Maybe it is because I know God is on our side. I don't know. I remember the same feeling when my boss told me back in 2008, that the ambulance was at my house, tending to my little brother who wrecked his bike. I remember thinking oh my goodness, and then just as quickly, "it's just a bike wreck,' he'll be fine, I just knew everything would be okay. Apparently that time wasn't lesson enough, because when I was told the news this time, (again, at work!!!) it had pretty much the same effect. I was worried instantly, but then calmed, and prayed, and knew everything would be okay. 

 

Today started out at work (just about midnight) with writing a letter to an Officer's family whose EOW was 5/22/16. Then I watched some hilarious videos with a co-worker. Then getting a happy birthday from a sweet patient that is stuck in the hospital while I get to leave for the day. I left work early to give my brother (whom I haven't seen since he moved into my house about a week ago) a ride to his truck. He works all day and I work all night. I came home to an empty sink, because my sister-roomie washed all the dishes as I left for work last night. I came home to a clean house, because my best friend picked up and vacuumed before she and my favorite nephews ended their stay here and took off for Winona. I came home to a cool house and a stocked pantry, because God has blessed me with these things. I baked a cake, made some brownies, then hit the hay, hard!

I didn't realize how exhausted I truly was until my head hit the pillow, then it was just zZzZzzZzz's from then until 4:30pm. I got up at 4:35pm, rolled out of my comfy bed, hopped in the shower (almost literally), and got dressed for work. Did the dishes from the morning, a load of laundry, sat around a little, then threw all the goodies in my car for work and hopped in the car headed to the ice cream shop.

By the way, if you are ever in the Armpit of America, KS, you should check that place out. (---> Here's their address and hours!) Until a couple nights ago I had only had their Mexican ice cream, which is absolutely delightful. Then the other day the mother of the man who owns the shop brought some delish frozen treats on a stick, that I cannot pronounce or spell (paleta con fresa possibly), and that, that was ah-mazing. Anywho, you should check it out!  

 

 

I slept, all day. (8 hours y'all!) Woke to many texts, snaps (you can see one of my favorite snaps of the day above), Facebook msgs & posts, and a couple missed phone calls.

 

I was called many names today. Rachael was one of them, odd I know.

 

Also:

 

Awesome, Kid, Rachy, Beautiful, Crrrazy, Dear, Loving 'Auntie', 'other' Daughter, Friend, Woman, Joyful Girl, Fun, Love, Ray of Sunshine, Rachael!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (+ or - a few !!!!!s), Rach, Missy, Dear Friend, Fabulous, Rayray, Weird, Odd, Energetic, Ball of Fun, Caring, 'Amazzz balls' person, & Ray-ray... to name a few. 

 

I woke realizing how many people that matter in my life actually might reciprocate my feelings for them. 

 

 

I woke wishing my little brother was here to celebrate with me, but knowing he is in a much better place, too consumed by God's awesomeness to peek down at this girl on her birthday or even pass a thought my way. And yes, for a moment, I forced all cares for what God has planned for me here on earth for the short time I get to be here aside, and allowed myself to be straight-up jealous of Simon. Jealous of his being in heaven, safe from this cruel, hateful, wicked world, but at the same time overly joyed that he is.

Then I remembered that I woke up. Had I not, I would be in a much better place right now, the best place ever, for the most bomb birthday party ever, but I woke up today. 

I woke up. 

I woke up today, because God is not done with me yet. 

I woke up today, because there are things in God's agenda that He wants me to help complete. 

I woke up today, because my patients need me. I woke up today, because I need my patients. 

I woke up today, so that my co-worker's could do their best to get their 25 spankings in before midnight. (I doubt they quit when my birthday is actually over...I can safely assume this will go all night, they haven't got very far yet.)

I woke up today so that others can know I have seen and felt the love they have shown me.

 

I woke up today to serve others.

I woke up today because God allowed me to wake up today.

 

I woke up today to serve Him.

 

 

I woke up, got ready for work. Grabbed some deliciousness from the Mexican ice cream shop on the way, along with some weird combo of chips, cabbage, cheese and hot sauce that a coworker ordered. Me being superwoman denied needing help to my car with the goods. Then I get to work, swipe my key fob-thingy-majigger, and boom. Dropped the weird combo of papas that was ordered...all over outside the door. Super. Fail. I just yell, then laugh, kick the mess off the sidewalk, then meander in to work. I then sit down for report and spill a co-worker's water all over the table. Fast forward 2 hours, and I sit down for my birthday supper celebration-meal at work, and somehow fling rice all over the table and a coworker. Let's just say, this day hasn't actually been 'my' day.

 

But that's okay, because it's the Lord's day anyway.

 

For my birthday celebration-meal a co-worker brought chicken quesadillas from Alejandro's restaurant here in town, can you say Mom-delish!? Nommmmmmmmnom. Another brought some great homemade rice. And sugar cookies from yet another co-worker. (Pictured with me at the beginning of this post!) Then yet another co-worker came up to work on her night off and blessed me with some delicious, hilarious, perfect gifts. (See pic below!) What a blessed little lady I am!  

 

As I entered my 25th year, I thought back to the past year of my life. I started with seeing, knowing, and acknowledging how very blessed I truly am. I celebrated the birth of my 4th nephew and the birth of my best friend's daughter. I celebrated birthdays of my other 3 nephews, as well as my 3 nieces. Celebrated the birthday of each of my 7 siblings and my parents. I was able to make the trip to New York to see very loved and very missed family and friends, memories I will treasure the rest of my sweet time here on earth. I was able to purchase my first home (so much adulting going on over here) <---(this computer thinks adulting is not a word and keeps changing it to adulating... I am just over here like, 'You don't know my life Windows!!'). I have made new friends. I have been able to keep in touch with old ones.

 

 

I just want to say thank you to all who have impacted my life this past year, whether positively (mostly) or negatively. I have learned something from all of you. Thank you to those who choose to put up with me (friends) and I apologize now to those of you that have to put up with me (family and co-workers). You all mean the world to me. I appreciate your many wishes on this quarter-of-a-century birthday of mine. :) 

As my day comes to a close, I simply remember this: 

 

1) I am loved.

 

 

2) I got 99 problems, but knowing where I am headed after I die ain't one of 'em.

 

 

3) He's got the whole world in His hands.

 

 

'Rejoice in the Lord always, again I will say, rejoice. Let your reasonableness be known to everyone. The Lord is at hand; do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things. What you have learned and received and heard and seen in me ---practice these things, and the God of peace will be with you.' ~Ephesians 4:4-9

 

 

Don't forget to check out the not-so-random Youtube videos I always post at the end of my blogs! I love music y'all!

 

Through All of It ~ Colton Dixon

Trust in You ~ Lauren Daigle

Great is Our God ~ Plumb
Who Am I ~ Casting Crowns

 

Thanks for reading, and God bless you!

What is Wrong with Me?

When a boy doesn't respond back after your first date. When a boy doesn't text or call you back after you hung out one time. When you find out your husband has been looking at porn. When your husband cheats on you physically or emotionally. What do we as women do?

We may get upset, may get angry, may even cry about it, and then we stop and begin to wonder. We question and doubt ourselves and our adequacy.

We wonder a lot of things, but mostly, 'What is wrong with me, and what did I do wrong?'  What is wrong with me? Am I not pretty enough? Am I not skinny enough?

We single ladies wonder all the above, and may also wonder: Was I too forward? Was I not forward enough? Does he think I am going to contact him first? Should I contact him first? Isn't the male supposed to plan the next date? Is that still the norm? We need to try and not get hung up on these questions, they can ruin a day, a week, even months if we let them. We must rest assured that God has a plan, and that He will reveal that plan and that man all in good time. 

I read an article, in fact, a couple of articles popped up with a similar message. I don't need a man to complete me, that is Jesus' job, I need a man to compliment me. Finding said man may take time, and some effort, but God has a plan and a purpose. No, I don't plan on hermit-ing in my house for years expecting God to bring my Mister Forever to my front door, to ring the bell, and drop to one knee saying God led him there. No, I don't think every Mister Right Now is 'The One.' But, what I have to keep reminding myself, is no matter what, God has a plan, and I need to keep my head up.

So, meanwhile in the waiting, I will keep praying, and I plan to keep this smile on my face, even while I struggle (mentally and emotionally) with dating and the single life. I plan to keep bringing joy to others with my quirkiness, and helping others out in any way I see necessary or am able.

Don’t get me wrong, a relationship with the right guy will someday prove to be a wonderful sweep-me-off-my-feet experience, well worth the effort and patience required to get there. But I know that if I'm looking for a guy to fill an empty spot in my heart, I'm asking for the impossible and will end up disappointed.

And you married folks dealing with porn addiction or cheating. No one quits anything alone, everyone who has a true addiction needs help, whether it just be you and God, or you, God, and your spouse, your Mom, a support group, a prayer/Bible study group, your church family. Whomever and whatever it takes, your spouse and your marriage are worth it, you decided that when you said 'I do.' So don't give up or give in now, keep fighting, keep your marriage bed holy, your marriage will be stronger after facing and battling through this. Take note of the warning signs of what led you to where you are today, hindsight is almost always 20-20, and now you know what big or little things you did, saw, or feelings you acted upon that led you to that low point, avoid those. Take the high road every time, you will never regret it. Maybe busying yourself and your mind with your spouse, your children, your tasks, your God will help.  Read your Bible; I find the more I dwell in His Word, the more I think on Him and the more I pray. Use Him to occupy your free time, rather than letting your mind wander, yield yourself to Christ rather than that porn site or that relationship that went too far with someone other than your spouse.

The struggle is real, always will be. So is God, and He ALWAYS will be. I find that when I pray, even when I may not be getting the answers I think I need in the timeframe I think I need them, just simply talking to God still helps lower my stress levels and anxiety. So chat it up with Him y'all! He wants to hear from you! I will never have all the answers to all of life's dilemmas, but I rest assured in knowing my God does! 

Here is a perfect song for those of us struggling to find completion without and/or before we find our significant other:  Completely- by Among the Thirsty

Twenty16: Not Introducing a New Me, but a Better Me, Through Him

Ready or not, the entire last year of your life has ended, welcome to 2016. I don't know about you, but I could write for an hour about things I did last year that made my life (and others' lives) more challenging than necessary. As I look back on 2015, every challenging moment, that sticks with me, was existent only because of something I had done or something I had chose to make worthy of my putting forth an effort to. If you missed it, that was all about me. There wasn't a lot of God involved in those decisions. Don't get me wrong, I pray. I read my Bible, I go to church at least every Sunday morning. If I am off Sundays, I put forth my best attempt to be present for the Sunday evening Bible studies. I attend our ladies' Bible study when I am off Thursday evenings, and I attend our ladies' prayer coffee when I am off Tuesday nights (it is Wednesday mornings dark and early at 0645). I absolutely love to be a part of these smaller groups, I thrive on them. I enjoy reading and studying more and more of God's Word. From the time I start getting ready, until I leave the event, drive home, and park in my driveway, all I can do is smile! I get excited to attend, and I always leave refreshed and having learnt something new. That is all God, and I thrive on Him!

And yet: when Satan is knocking on my heart or making his way into my mind and life...sometimes I don't even realize it, I let him set up camp and hang out for awhile. That has come back to bite me. Things occurred in my life in 2015 that I have vowed to myself, and others, will never ever happen again. I seriously hurt a friend of mine emotionally, and that was never my intention. I have never in my life planned to hurt someone, as I suspect most people don't. Sometimes it just happens, we make decisions everyday: I did not always make the appropriate or best one. I believe good comes through every mistake God lets us make in our lives, I have learned my lesson, harshly (rightly so), and with consequences (rightly so), but nonetheless learned. I sometimes pride myself on being a good person, (though that alone is already a sin) I do believe I have a good heart, a heart set on being kind to others and building other people up, but we all make decisions, simply put, I made some wrong ones.

Being a Christian, I am aware that the sins I commit will be forgiven, in fact, have already been forgiven. That is not why I sin nor is it why I continue to defy God's commandments and will for me. I am human, I was born with sin. Though I now have been washed clean by the blood of Christ, He still gives me the right of choice. Daily, I have to make a choice to live for Him, to do everything for His glory. Sometimes I don't stick to that initial choice. Sometimes other emotions and things in life come in and fog my vision, and the path I chose when I rose out of bed may now be less clear or less desirable to me (enter Satan stage left) Sometimes the higher road requires some work and discipline, and sometimes I choose to not be cut out for it. I shouldn't, I have no excuse to do so; God has provided me with all the tools I could possibly need to fight the devil off and continue down the right path each and every day. Yet I opt out of trusting Him, out of using those tools to fight my way down the path that may require more work that day, for decisions and opportunities that make me happier in the moment, choices that were easy to make incorrectly because the devil made them more appealing and the struggle less overwhelming. Trusting God and praying is the most important thing I can ever do when being faced with a choice between right and wrong; nothing I do will ever be easier than praying to the One that is always listening. In addition to His omnipresent self, the Lord has also blessed me with a way-beyond-fantastic support system of believers all around me; a quick drive, or a couple touches on my phone screen, and someone will be there for me. 

The Bible says, "If God is for us, who can be against us?" {Romans 8:31b}


So why do I fail so easily, so often?


The Bible, in the book of John says, "The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full." {John 10:10 NIV} 

I have quite brutally suffered from letting Satan come in and try and run my life because of the decisions I have made, but not anymore! I gave that to Jesus, and have tried my best to not be that person anymore! I do not believe that today I am a totally different person from the person I was on December 31st, 2015; it being a new year does not make a new person. But throughout the past few months, God and I have been working together to bring a better me to the playing field, a better me to show His love to others. God has pushed, poked, and prodded me, using His Word, family members, friends, and my church family, to help mold me into the person you would find within me today. I can only pray and continue to strive to be an even better person, because even still at this moment, my past mistakes lurk, and sometimes steal my joy! But I must refuse to let Satan win! I will fight the good fight with the One who can never be defeated.  Going to church, attending the extra activities that my church offers, that is not what makes me a Christian, it is my believing in Him and what He did for me dying on the cross for my sins, and me living my life for Him that makes me a Christian.


Strangely Dim by Francesca Battistelli ---> hear it here!!

Greater by MercyMe ---> hear it here!

#letgoandletGod #easiersaidthandonesometimes #praypraypray

Field Guide to Heaven

Romans road to salvation

 

The road is marked by a selected group of verses from Romans in the New Testament. If you walk this road, you will hopefully end up understanding how to be saved, and why it is necessary. If you are already saved, then you will have at your fingertips and disposal everything you need to help bring others to a relationship with our Father. This road defines who needs salvation, and why. How God provides us with it, and how we receive it, and the results of doing so. This road is not as long as you think, and it all starts with a single step of faith.

Romans 3:23 "For all have sinned, and come short of the glory of God;"
Admit that you are a sinner. We are all sinners by nature and by choice. No one is perfect, no not one. And all of us fall short of God's holy standards. So who needs this salvation? Everyone. Why? Because we are sinners, we fall short, we do not deserve, yet if we ask we will receive it.

Romans 6:23 "For the wages of sin is death; but the gift of God is eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord."
Understand that you deserve death for your sin, and ask God to forgive you for your sin. We receive eternal life as a free gift. Repent and be saved.

Romans 5:8 "But God commendeth His love towards us, in that, while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us."
Give your life to God. His love poured out on the cross for you is your only hope to have forgiveness and change. His love bought you out of slavery to sin. His love is what saves you, not religion, not attending church. God loves you. He demonstrated His love for us, His enemies.

Romans 10:9-10 "That if thou shalt confess with thy mouth the Lord Jesus, and shalt believe in thine heart that God hath raised him from the dead, thou shalt be saved. For with the heart man believeth unto righteousness; and with the mouth confession is made unto salvation."
We must trust and surrender to Jesus Christ. We must confess it with as mouths as well as believe it in our hearts.

Romans 10:13 "For whoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved."
Call out to God in the name of Jesus. There is our assurance of salvation through Jesus.

If you believe these words put forth by Jesus, pray to Him, tell Him, and then be sure to seek out a Bible-believing church that will nurture and help you grow in your relationship with God in your newfound faith. It is vital for your spiritual health. Be sure to tell someone, let someone know of your exciting news, find someone who is saved to help show you how to jumpstart your growth. Then shout it from the mountaintops, proclaim it to the world, for none are worthy, no not one, but all are in need of this Savior.