We may get upset, may get angry, may even cry about it, and then we stop and begin to wonder. We question and doubt ourselves and our adequacy.
We wonder a lot of things, but mostly, 'What is wrong with me, and what did I do wrong?' What is wrong with me? Am I not pretty enough? Am I not skinny enough?
We single ladies wonder all the above, and may also wonder: Was I too forward? Was I not forward enough? Does he think I am going to contact him first? Should I contact him first? Isn't the male supposed to plan the next date? Is that still the norm? We need to try and not get hung up on these questions, they can ruin a day, a week, even months if we let them. We must rest assured that God has a plan, and that He will reveal that plan and that man all in good time.
I read an article, in fact, a couple of articles popped up with a similar message. I don't need a man to complete me, that is Jesus' job, I need a man to compliment me. Finding said man may take time, and some effort, but God has a plan and a purpose. No, I don't plan on hermit-ing in my house for years expecting God to bring my Mister Forever to my front door, to ring the bell, and drop to one knee saying God led him there. No, I don't think every Mister Right Now is 'The One.' But, what I have to keep reminding myself, is no matter what, God has a plan, and I need to keep my head up.
So, meanwhile in the waiting, I will keep praying, and I plan to keep this smile on my face, even while I struggle (mentally and emotionally) with dating and the single life. I plan to keep bringing joy to others with my quirkiness, and helping others out in any way I see necessary or am able.
Don’t get me wrong, a relationship with the right guy will someday prove to be a wonderful sweep-me-off-my-feet experience, well worth the effort and patience required to get there. But I know that if I'm looking for a guy to fill an empty spot in my heart, I'm asking for the impossible and will end up disappointed.
And you married folks dealing with porn addiction or cheating. No one quits anything alone, everyone who has a true addiction needs help, whether it just be you and God, or you, God, and your spouse, your Mom, a support group, a prayer/Bible study group, your church family. Whomever and whatever it takes, your spouse and your marriage are worth it, you decided that when you said 'I do.' So don't give up or give in now, keep fighting, keep your marriage bed holy, your marriage will be stronger after facing and battling through this. Take note of the warning signs of what led you to where you are today, hindsight is almost always 20-20, and now you know what big or little things you did, saw, or feelings you acted upon that led you to that low point, avoid those. Take the high road every time, you will never regret it. Maybe busying yourself and your mind with your spouse, your children, your tasks, your God will help. Read your Bible; I find the more I dwell in His Word, the more I think on Him and the more I pray. Use Him to occupy your free time, rather than letting your mind wander, yield yourself to Christ rather than that porn site or that relationship that went too far with someone other than your spouse.
The struggle is real, always will be. So is God, and He ALWAYS will be. I find that when I pray, even when I may not be getting the answers I think I need in the timeframe I think I need them, just simply talking to God still helps lower my stress levels and anxiety. So chat it up with Him y'all! He wants to hear from you! I will never have all the answers to all of life's dilemmas, but I rest assured in knowing my God does!
Here is a perfect song for those of us struggling to find completion without and/or before we find our significant other: Completely- by Among the Thirsty
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