It's Just a Season

This too shall pass. This is only a season. Nothing about your life now is how it is going to be forever. Though my circumstances may not change right now, tomorrow, or maybe not even next year, my outlook can. It can change right now. No matter the rut you feel you are stuck in, your heavenly Father is always there to pull you out. No matter what got you here, He will never leave or forsake you. 

Here is a picture of my earthly father assisting me down our rarely moist road to the river bottom where we had cows calving that needed checked. He has been an example of what a good father is quite often in my life, but I thought he was a prime example of our Daddy up in heaven right here. He wasn't pulling me through this mud because I had a plan or mission in mind, no. Here he was pulling me through the mud that I could not have made it through on my own that day because he had a mission for himself and for me. He had a plan, and he wanted me there to help his plan unfold. It's the same way with God. He doesn't need us but rather he wants us. He wants us there to help His plans unfold. He wants us to better His kingdom in ways He makes possible for us in our earthly bodies. But He doesn't want us to feel neglected or unwanted either. He wants us to feel needed and appreciated. But He also wants to be enough for you. He wants to know that you don't need anyone else, but that you want them. You want them in your lives to help fulfill His purpose in your time here on earth.

Sometimes we get impatient while waiting on God for His perfect timing. But sometimes God is actually the one waiting on us. Waiting on us to believe, to have faith. Waiting on us to stop being lazy about our quiet time with Him. Waiting for us to get our butts out of bed an hour before work to pray and dive into His Word.

Relax. God has the one for you. At some point in your life, someone will love you more than the expectations you have grown in the waiting. Be patient and learn to wait, because sometimes a patient person receives the best love story. Who better to receive the best love story than you?

 

Lord, help us believe. Help us be consistent in doing so. Help us consistently be in Your Word and in conversation with You, so that we may be ready when the enemy attacks us. Help us remember that when we believe, everything else will fall together. Help us remember that when we have faith, You will take care of the rest.



We need to change our outlook. We need to remember that He can move mountains on our behalf. He will bless us with the desires of our heart, according to His will, not our own. All we need to do is show Him how faithful we can be, even in the 'little' areas in our lives. He is waiting for you. God is waiting for us.

As in many events in my life, I turned to the scriptures (God's Word) to help me understand, to comprehend, and to help motivate me to keep living a life God wants for me. In this time, I look to Job. Why Job, you ask? Well, poor poor Job. God allowed Satan to directly attack Job. Job is a prime example of faithfulness as he loses all that matters to him, all that is important in his life, yet chooses to remain faithful to God. (Job 1:12) He loses his health, his wife tells him to curse God and commit suicide! But still Job remains faithful and strong. (Job 1:22). Later on his friends give him lots of bad advice. They blame his sufferings on his sins rather than God testing and growing Job. One of them was half right, saying that God wanted to humble him, but this was only a part of God's test.  Then on to the last chapters in Job. God speaks to Job. He restores him. He knows that Job received inaccurate counsel from his friends, 'Who is this that darkens counsel by words without knowledge?' (Job 38:2) God fittingly declares that humans do not know everything. Then He humbles Job by asking a series of questions that could never be answered by anyone other than the Almighty God Himself; 'Have you understood the expanse of the earth? Tell me, if you know all this.' (Job 38:18) God then brings him to an understanding that believers don't always know what God is doing in their lives. In the end, Job answers God by saying, “I have declared that which I did not understand.” (Job 42:3) God then blessed Job with twice as much as he had before his trials began.

Do I feel like I am being attacked in any way comparable to that which Job was attacked? No. But I do know that I find myself impatient with life. Knowing where I thought I would have been by the time I was 25, and knowing where I find myself now, just 12 days prior to that day, well I find myself dwelling on all the things that should have been, the things that could have been, and questioning the things that would have been... I see the devil try to slip his hand into the play book and send me doubting the One who gave me breath.

Sometimes I look at my past and wonder if I am single because of the steps I chose to get to where I am today. Sometimes I wonder if I had prayed harder and listened to God more, read His Word more, listened to my mentors more, if life would have led me a little differently. If I would be somewhere else, and by this time with someone else. If my roommate would be a husband to dote on instead of my sister. If my king-sized bed would be shared every night (ha! I work night shift, dream on self) with the love of my life, rather than the occasional niece, nephew, sister, sister in law, friend. If my shower would be cluttered with men's soap, my sink sprinkled with his facial hair, my bathroom door draped with 2 bath towels instead of 1, my closet shared with men's clothing. I wonder if maybe God just needs a break from me, maybe I have been asking too much, maybe I am too needy. Maybe if I stop praying for such things, God will just let him fall into my lap, figuratively.
 

 I think a lot of things, and then I remember my Pastor praying early one Sunday morning, that the single people in our church/community, that they too would be blessed. Lord I know that I am blessed, but I pray You would help me feel it. Help me know what You want of me while I wait for Mr. Forever. Help me know what You want me to do for You in the meantime. Help me continue to pray, with an open (though longing) heart, as I wait to be joined with the one You have in my future. Lord, with all my heart I believe You have not called me to be single forever. With all my heart, my absolute love for children, my longing for a man in my life, I know that you would not have these traits be a part of me, except to prepare me for being a wife and mother. Lord, with all my heart, I pray You would wrap your arms around me and complete me while I continue to try and find my Mr. Forever to compliment me.

Just like Job, on the other side of your big mess, there is a huge blessing. Whether your big mess is something you're waiting for, something you are stuck in the midst of, or even something you have done. Instead of doubting if God still cares about us and our desires, maybe we need to question if we still care about God. We must remember this is just a season, and this too shall pass.

O Lord ~ NF                                 Though You Slay Me ~ Shane & Shane

 

 

"We are not put on earth merely to satisfy our desires, to pursue life, liberty, and happiness.

 

We are here to be changed, to be made more like God, in order to prepare us for a lifetime with him."

~ Philip Yancey

 

Patience not your best virtue? Check out this blog here, on waiting on God and His always perfect timing ---> 'Mom, I'm Hungry!'

Tests in Life

'Deeper love...down to our very soul. It's there we have an anchor who will not let us go; the Lord who calmed the sea is the One who sees us through; He's given us...a deeper love.' ~Diane Machen

 

I remember the day I woke for my NCLEX (state board exam for nursing). I woke up, early of course, for some (probably useless) last minute cramming. I remember showing up early, my stomach in my throat, threatening to expel it's contents at any second. I remember emptying my pockets' contents and my phone into a locker. I remember scanning my fingerprint(s). Being led to a computer in a room of about 6 desktops. I remember quietly filling my lungs to max capacity and letting it out slowly. Then starting. I don't remember any of the questions, in fact I couldn't even tell you today, just a year and a half after taking it, what one of the frequent topics was. I remember answering the 75th question (50 minutes into the test) and then the test shutting off. At that moment, the inhale was much sharper, and I felt immediate hypertension onset. I knew with all my heart that I had just failed. I did not feel confident about most of the topics that happened to come through the mix. I remember sitting there for a minute in utter disbelief, already dreading another testing fee. I then gathered myself, exited the room, grabbed my things from the locker, did my best to smile at the desk lady (wasn't her fault I had just failed), and exited the building, only to be met by the gorgeous and sunny mid-June day that had been forming outside. The weather alone should have been enough to lift my spirits, the sun alone usually did the trick, but not that day.

I had learned of a suggested 'cheat' or quick way to know if you passed or not online, by trying to schedule another date, but it wasn't a proven hack. If it let you schedule another test, you failed. If it didn't you presumably passed. My blood pressure dipped a little after I was unable to do so. At which point, I took my stressed self into my room, threw on some sneakers, and went and hoofed a good 7 miles around Hays; all the while praying, hoping, wishing that I had passed that test, all the while having a huge gut feeling I hadn't. I didn't text anyone, I didn't call anyone, it was just God, my crazy emotions, and I. The last 2 were a bad match that day. I mean total hot mess status.

There are few moments where I had ever felt so nervous or anxious that I just knew if I did anything other than breathe, I was going to vomit. In fact, I can only think of two since that day. But each time, including that day, whatever was going to happen, was going to happen. But I am human, so worry is exactly what I did. I am not usually an anxious person, but that day my anxiety was probably at a committable level.

 

That's the thing, no matter what happens with each test we are faced with in life, we can only do so much, we can only control so much of the outcome. All we can do is the best to our ability, and trust in the Lord's will to be fulfilled and the outcome, no matter what, will be the best for us, because that is all God wants for His children. So no matter how hard it is, the more you trust God, the more you grow in your faith in Him, the more you jump in and read His Word, the easier relying on Him and all things working out will come to you.

If you're wondering, or missed it in my bio, I passed my boards that day. Lost a bunch of calories walking a bunch of miles while in my anxious mess, but the stomach contents remained contained, and I will never forget the overwhelming joy I felt when I saw my name on KSBN's website, as officially, Rachael Ann Smith, RN for the first time. I cried, I cried a lot of tears, loudly, into a pillow because there may or may not have been neighbors downstairs. And then, I cried some more, meanwhile kicking myself for not only doubting myself, but for having doubt in God, in trusting that no matter what I had or had not accomplished that day, that it would all work out for His good, for His glory.

So let us not forget:
 

'You, dear children, are from God and have overcome them, because the one who is in you is greater than the one who is in the world.' 1 John 4:4 (NIV)

 

Greater - MercyMe <---listen here

I chose this song, simply because, He is greater. He is greater than you and I, only He is in control of the outcome when it comes to our lives. Don't let the small battles get you caught up, that is just Satan choking you out of doing the Lord's work. You don't bound over 4 hurdles at a time in the 110m hurdle race, no, just one by one. Take each battle, one by one, and you will see the outcome, no matter if it is what you predicted/wanted or not, will be the right one. He is greater than any battle we may face. Pray, try your hardest in all you do, and believe He has your best interest at heart at all times.